Monthly Archives: May 2021

Bedrock isn’t smooth. There are rocks in there and it can get bumpy.  I’ll be honest and tell you that parts of learning my new job feel like road construction.  The cerebral highway crews in my brain are directing traffic as they build the roads and bridges.  Each day I am putting down another layer of knowledge, but right now I’m driving on bedrock, and I still need to go the speed limit and ask for directions.

You know the times they are a-changin’ when Bob Dylan turns 80.  I didn’t realize this momentous occasion was rearing its bald head until WUMB started playing a bunch of Bob Dylan songs.  If he has 80 candles on his cake, he’ll need something blowin’ in the wind to put them out.  Once that feat is accomplished he can party like a rolling stone.

No one died, but one woman fell by the elevator.  When she got up and walked away, we all knew she was okay.  It was a good first day.  I checked in a few patients, and when they were done I scheduled them for their next appointment.  As far as I can tell that is going to be the bulk of my workload most of the time.  Thankfully my co-workers are there to help.  There are a lot ins and outs that I’ll need to learn, but it seems like everyone is happy that I’m there… and if I’m honest I guess I am too.

…you’re out of pier, and it’s time to jump in the lake.  The official training is over.  My job starts today.  Each classroom session felt like a board on a pier and now it’s time to take the plunge.  My department head told me I wouldn’t hit the ground running today, but I know there will be times that feel like cold water on my skin.  What else can I say except– Geronimo!

All hands on deck!  By week’s end we’ll be full to the gunwales and ready to sling your hook!  This second week of job training feels more like learning the ropes.  The first week felt like I was dropped in the ocean to sink or swim.  The phrase, “learning the ropes,” has nautical origins.  A sailor had to learn which ropes would move the sail to catch the wind, and then tie it just right so he wouldn’t blow the man down.  In the classroom we’ve been going over so many “ropes” I might trip over them on my first day. Oh well.

I can’t help it, I love the underdog, and Mystery Science Theater 3000 (aka MST3K) is one feisty underdog.  MST3K is currently on Netflix– but not for long. It got canceled again.  It’s a goofy show where a man in space is forced to watch a bad movie with his robot pals.  The movie quickly becomes the butt of their jokes when they make funny remarks as soon as the opening credits roll.  MST3K has been on TV off an on since 1989.  Each time they found a new network to air the show, it eventually got canceled.  Recently the show’s creator, Joel Hodgson, decided to bypass the networks and go straight to the fans.  They overshot their goal of $5.5 million and actually raised $6.5 million to fund the show.  I personally pledged $42.  See you at the Gizmoplex!

“When you see that color, push this button.”  I wonder if the space monkeys that flew those first NASA missions knew what they were getting into.  Last week I started training for my new job.  Most of it has been in a classroom setting going over multiple aspects of the job.  At one point I told an instructor that it feels like a lot of spaghetti has been thrown against my brain wall and I don’t know how much will stick.  If it leaves a stain, I’ll be happy.  Once I make it to the moon, I’ll make happier monkey sounds.