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*this originally appeared on the homer’s coffeehouse blog. i was the main contributor for almost 5 years. no one read it, but i didn’t care. this particular post was a fake story for a featured drink: the citrus sisters. here it is from may 6, 2015:
wilma henderson gave birth to twin girls on a weekday. everything seemed normal until the doctor gave the routine spank to make them inhale. as soon the as air entered their lungs a glow filled the delivery room, and their skin changed color. wilma thought she was the only one seeing the strange spectacle of crying luminescent babies until she realized the nurses were shielding their own eyes. she named her girls neon and dionne, and after a rough childhood the sisters moved to california where they became successful recording artists. hush tang was their first release on a major label which consisted of lullabies for migrant babies in the citrus groves.

nixon was the first president i remember. elvis was the first rock n’ roller i knew about. i became aware of both of them in the 1970′s. however, the first time i saw this photo was in the early 90′s, and it kinda blew my mind. the story goes that elvis wrote a letter to the president expressing “concern for the country” because of the drug culture, hippie elements, black panthers, etc. nixon met with elvis because he was trying to win over america’s young people. two weeks ago i found out someone actually made a movie about this occasion.

last friday night in overland park it was grey, and a little cool, but people still came to salon kitch to beep on veggies, play the theremin, and transform their voices. it was the highest number of random people we’ve had during third fridays for beep goes the weasel.  one of the coolest things i saw was shay (not sure if that’s how you spell his name) giving beat box lessons to another pedestrian. he was making really cool sounds on the voice transformer, and a woman passing by asked “how are you doing that?” so he showed her.

this friday beep goes the weasel returns to salon kitch for local life, and our team of experts at the national weather service are forecasting autumn-ish temps in the 50s. we don’t know when spring will actually get here, but we’ll put on sweaters that night and still jam on fruits, veggies, AND kitch’s art will be on display! salon kitch is at 7333 W 80th St. between wayne’s barber shop and fred’s train store.

this is joshua. he’s 13 years old, and i’m giving him guitar lessons every other week. last sunday i was teaching him a blues riff from a muddy waters song. it’s one of the few things i know. joshua comes from an artistic family, so it’s pretty easy to be his guitar teacher.

james palmer was my roommate when i attended MNU. we dived in the same dumpsters, stole shower heads from other dorms, and avoided our freshman hazing by dismantling the lock on our door. recently jenny & i got an invitation to his daughter’s high school graduation reception, so we went. dana palmer is an amazing artist, and ironically she is getting a full ride art scholarship at the same college where her dad and i broke more rules than we followed. i can’t remember what medium she used, but the pic above is by dana. i told her it looked like a cross between bing crosby and tom waits. she had no idea who i was talking about.

motel mancini returned to the river market early this morning playing the hits… and the misses. it was 54 degrees when we started so we layered and tried to stay in the sun. a friendly tipper (matt) took this photo of us. he offered to use his polaroid, but i asked him to use my smartphone so we could have a digital pic for the blog. we’re going back tomorrow with reinforcements (clay).

this is what it looked and sounded like when beep goes the weasel was at salon kitch a couple of months ago. we were having technical difficulties with the veggies so we gave them the night off. we’ll be back there on may 20 with guitars, veggies, theremin, a voice transformer, and anything else that can fit in the back of my jeep.

a recent mortified podcast revealed one girl’s secret crush on… the high school janitor! here’s a couple of minutes of rachel goldberg reading from her 2003 diary. if you wanna hear the whole 25 minute episode you can click here, but brace yourself for graphic teenage obscenities.

…or “whatcha gonna watch?” my answer would be cleanin’ up the town, a ghostbusters documentary scheduled for july 16 (early birthday present for me!). i found out about this on the retroist, one of my many online time travel “go to” destinations.